Sunday, June 8, 2008

Stronger Than You Know...

Christine of Watch Me; No, Watch Me posted list of 100 facts about herself that had me howling (and if I am 100% honest, I laughed so hard I tooted...). With great thoughtfulness, she posted a link wherein readers could also learn 100 interesting, booty-kicking facts about themselves.
I'll pay the favor forward after you read -- and quake -- after learning...

Top 10 Facts About Twinfatuation Cheryl
(*After reading all 100, the Double Daddy thought it was simply too intimidating...)

1.) Superman owns a pair of Twinfatuation Cheryl pajamas.

2.) Twinfatuation Cheryl invented black. In fact, she invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink. (I KNEW IT!---CRL)

3.) When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Twinfatuation Cheryl.
4.) Twinfatuation Cheryl's calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Twinfatuation Cheryl.

5.) The word "gay" derives from an old Latin phrase that roughly translates as "He who has not yet been introduced to Twinfatuation Cheryl."

6.) Twinfatuation Cheryl doesn't read books. She stares them down until she gets the information she wants.

7.) Twinfatuation Cheryl always asks for the same Christmas gift: A box of Smurfs and a sledgehammer.

8.) Twinfatuation Cheryl destroyed the periodic table, saying Twinfatuation Cheryl only recognizes the element of surprise.

9.)Twinfatuation Cheryl can kill two stones with one bird.

10.) Twinfatuation Cheryl puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".

11.) Twinfatuation Cheryl was born with the right to party. Unlike the rest of us, who have to fight for it.

12.) Twinfatuation Cheryl doesn't have to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Tall buildings duck under Twinfatuation Cheryl.

13.) The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan borrowed two bucks from Twinfatuation Cheryl and forgot to pay her back.

14.) Twinfatuation Cheryl sleeps with a night light. Not because Twinfatuation Cheryl is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Twinfatuation Cheryl

15.) Twinfatuation Cheryl's blood type is WD-40.

16.) Circles exist because Twinfatuation Cheryl beat the crap out of some squares.

17.) When Twinfatuation Cheryl enters a room, she doesn't turn the lights on, she turns the dark off.

18.) Onions do not make Twinfatuation Cheryl cry. Twinfatuation Cheryl makes onions crap themselves.

19.) Weeping Willows are a result of Twinfatuation Cheryl yelling at trees for not being tough enough.

20.) If you play Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" backwards, you will hear Twinfatuation Cheryl laughing at you.

21.) When Twinfatuation Cheryl goes to donate blood, she declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

So I posted 21. Bet you won't push the issue after seeing just how tough I really am.

Go discover how dastardly you are.

4 comments:

Kelsey said...

OMG 10 is great!

Christine said...

They are pretty hysterical, no?

I think one and six are my faves. And nineteen. And twenty.

Glad you enjoyed them!

And it's funny that kelsey picked out number ten...you commented on that one at my place, too!

Laura said...

This is so clever. I think Circus Peanuts are Twinfatuation Cheryl's power source.

Threeundertwo said...

Hilarious. I had to go run my name through the site.