Old Yeller

[This is a repost from August '08----motivated by the amazing Jill of Scary Mommy, who recently was distressed by a parenting moment in which she disappointed herself, and she fears/feared, her son. Enjoy.]

Scream-free parenting: Not an adherant, and if entirely truthful, not even an advocate.

Call me insensitive, call me reactionary, call health and human services, but I genuinely believe occasions occur wherein a little strategically applied vocal verve effectively sells it to the back of the house.

For those genuinely fearful for my sweeties' psyches, perhaps a bit of clarification is merited. If a napkin doesn't make it to a lap, my larynx isn't overworked. If the playroom is in utter disarray, I don't dole out the decibels. Hurting each other? I'm hollerin'.

In the 21st century, my fear is that as a parenting population, we tend to tippy-toe too tentatively, viewing our children's omnihappiness (yes, the "yelling" inhibits glee temporarily; but to my view, justly. Isn't that how correction/behavior-modification occurs? Don't those mice in the maze get an ever-so-slight buzz in order to learn the "right" path?) as more important than their ability to cope adequately in the inevitably non-coddling adult environment. Risking their long-term social acumen and fluency for the fleeting parental "self-satisfaction" of maintaining my cool (and their "friendship") by following the highly touted tot-raising trends du jour just seems far more insensitive than my currently employed, twin audience attention-getting, maternal method. I don't want my kids to enter adulthood emotionally ill-equipped -- having never confronted "enthusiastic" redirection.

For me: Loud = Love.

[Side benefit: Sarah and Darren are familiar with large, open mouths.]