Laryngitis Lessons

-Every thing said aloud doesn’t always need to be said aloud. Greater thrift with spoken words might be widely appreciated.

-The oft-repeated adage, “Whisper---it gets people’s attention” is a bald-faced lie.

-Unimportant requests should be pondered carefully and likely need not be verbalized. Learn to deal with the TV volume two clicks too high (or too low…), just pick up the socks under the dining room table without asking whose they are, and must blame be audibly assigned to whomever left the empty bag of Hershey’s Kisses in the cupboard?

-Dogs may be able to discern frequencies humans cannot, but that does not mean Rover will respond to your diminished-decibel urgings to stop eating mulch.

 -If a tween is showering upstairs, and Mute Mommy is downstairs, rather than attempt to holler a “The curtain goes in the tub!” reminder, go in person.

-Kids realize---at least on a cursory level---occasional parental limitations.

(Although after saying something intentionally controversial, She-Twin erupted, “Aren’t you going to SAY something?” Then, she remembered…I could not.)

-Select your words deliberately. When forced to write the message one wishes to express, the time required to put pen to slate encourages surprising brevity. Secondary revelation: It’s tough to criticize the offspring’s penmanship when in the era of computer composition, my own (especially when executed expeditiously) has deteriorated significantly. 

-No better time to role-model “If you have nothing nice to say….”

-Loved ones have your back. They are less helpless than you think. Give ‘em some credit, some independence, and some thanks…even if you cannot speak the words.