Monday, May 12, 2008

Tea from Two



When our children have gotten more than one invitation for parties scheduled to occur simultaneously, we've made it very clear they need to accept the first invitation given, and express their sincere regrets to the second.

But what of invitations received virtually in tandem? Such was the case for me, when asked twice to the Mother's Day Tea and Program at Darren and Sarah's school Friday. Thankfully, both classes (as well as the other three kindergarten classes) were all observing the festivities collectively in the cafeteria.

Not so easy? The placement of my actual presence following the recited poems and read verses. Each child was to "serve" tea and cookies to their mom at their class-designated table. (Granted, twice the tea and cookies is not such an unpleasant thing...) Without much time to think it through, as the program concluded, I sprinted to Darren's table, asked his wonderful teacher if I might collect him and sit with both of my kids together at Sarah's class table. (The last time I was a class volunteer, I did so for Darren's class on a field trip. Seemed like Sarah's turn somehow. And I could tell from a distance, she was experiencing some post-performance teariness...as were several of her dressed-to-the-nines galpals.) Always lovely and accommodating, Ms. F said sure, and off we tried to go. But of course Darren wanted to stay with his friends...(sadly, most of whom did not have a mom in attendance).

So off I went to a pained looking Sarah. Weepy and weary after a long day and the adrenaline rush of reading aloud in front of a sizeable audience, "Did you hear me read all those big words, Mom? I read 'enriched!'" she sat on my lap and we had some tea and plenty of butter cookies. My eyes kept straying to find Darren, and I attempted to wave him to us repeatedly. He came a few times, with two to three of his classmates who so desperately need attention and affection. So betwixt kissing on and loving on my own two, I felt the need to hug on and kiss on these other sweet boys who were clinging to Darren -- and by association, a mom -- for all they were worth.

I hear you asking now, "Don't you wish you'd put them in the same class?" to which I still answer a resounding no. Without a doubt, separate classes have been the wisest (albeit occasionally parentally challenging) and most socially and academically beneficial for our twins. When it comes to the school functions, we've been able to maneuever a one-parent-per-kid scenario with remarkable frequency...a family form of "divide and conquer."

Friday, I simply felt "divided." However, when I realize the blessing it is to have two beautiful, loving and compassionate same-age children, and the ability to attend so very many of their special events, I feel far from conquered.


2 comments:

TONYA said...

Oh I feel so sad for Darren's friends reading this. As a parent who's always volunteered in the classroom it amazes me how many parents cannot make it to these wonderful events.

I've always wondered what to do with my twins when they get to 'school age', whether to split them up or keep them together. I'd always thought if I had same sex twins they'd be separated but with boy/girl, I'm not sure what to do.

Goddess in Progress said...

I love their "signatures." I distinctly remember going through a curlicue phase in my handwriting... :-)